


whichever way the wind blows ( derek's f-kd anyhow)

by ofself



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, Vaguely AU, bullet points and lists, derek hale haz them, derek has feels, inappropriate crushing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-27
Updated: 2012-05-27
Packaged: 2017-11-06 03:29:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/414218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofself/pseuds/ofself
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To summarize succinctly, Derek goes from being restless werewolf with on a quest to find out who killed his sister with a completely inappropriate crush on a seventeen year old to a newly minted alpha with a pack full of disgruntled teens for company with an even more inappropriate crush on a seventeen year old.</p><p>All because he had feelings which he just HAD to share. Like a girl. With his paralyzed uncle.</p><p>Based on <a href="http://jebiwonkenobi.tumblr.com/post/22641336730/can-we-talk-about-the-part-where-peter-says-you">this</a> prompt by jebiwonkenobi.</p>
            </blockquote>





	whichever way the wind blows ( derek's f-kd anyhow)

Derek knows he comes off like some sort of a lone ranger/lone wolf whatever have you. And he’s actually okay with that. If there’s one thing about cultivating a grumpy persona it’s that at least many people don’t try to start stupid pointless conversations with you. And the ones who do, well, they can be scared away with a growl or two. Derek quite enjoys it because he really doesn’t have the patience to be some polite upstanding member of society who gives a fuck.

Derek Hale _does.not.have.fucks.to.give._

But for every rule, there’s always an exception.

And of course, because the universe always likes to shit on Derek, for him, it’s Stiles.

Derek can be the most unpleasant, grumpiest person ever to grace the planet and Stiles still cheerfully treats him like the best friend he has ever had. (Well, second best friend if you count Scott but Derek won’t cause Scott is an idiot and Derek always likes being best at everything. Though he supposes that being the best friend of Stiles Stillinski is a dubious distinction at best, but still…wait, where was he? Godammit, he apparently even rambles pointlessly like Stiles does now.)

Any lesser person faced with Derek’s appalling lack of tact and bluntness would have probably run away screaming with a whole lot of tears and a bucket load of self-esteem issues but not Stiles.

In fact, it only earns him a ridiculous nickname.

Sourwolf.

What the fuck is that even supposed to mean?

Stupid teenagers and their stupid, moronic nicknaming tendencies.

\--

Of course, in another show of support from the universe, Derek realises with some amount of muted horror that while he has gone around,

a) Throwing Stiles up against surfaces horizontal and vertical.

 b) enjoying the process of treating Stiles like a ragdoll who has somewhat girly reactions – seriously, Stiles flutters his eyelashes like a schoolgirl and squeaks like teenage girl whenever Derek creeps up on him- which even more aggravatingly gives him boners, which he of course only disguises with more violence, thinking that it’s a violence thing which is a little creepy and yes, more violence isn’t the answer, except it is, _so there_.

c) Held a few mostly one-sided conversations with him and even grudgingly enjoyed them (he’s admitting that to no one), so his idiotic mind, aided ably and traitorously by his heart has decided that he has a crush on Stiles.

More like presumed. Ha.

Also, assumed. Double ha.

Except, ha?

The knowledge, that yes, he is actually crushing on stupid Stiles Stillinski is depressing because once again,

a)      It’s widely known all over Beacon Hills that Stiles has always and _only_ ever had a hard on for Lydia Martin who quite wisely, will never give him the time of the day. Which in Derek's opinion is good because if he's going to sit around, all frustrated and rejected then his object of grumpy affection had damn well do the same too.

b)      Stiles isn’t even bisexual, let alone gay so there is no hope at all.

c)       And, god, it is Stiles Stillinski, of all people. 

Werewolves should have to have crushes on people whose heads they want to bite off!

And yes, while so far Derek has been doing pretty good with his, ‘ _I don’t need no one to talk to routine_ ’ he kind of needs to talk to someone or at least confess in some manner about his completely inappropriate crush before he goes batshit insane.

Of course, here also there are problems.  (He’s beginning to notice that the universe seems to really enjoy messing with him. Seriously? Is his never ending life crisis excellent material for jokes? Cause he doesn’t think so. Fuck you universe.)

One, Derek only ever really talks to Stiles. Well, Stiles talks and Derek growls and grunts and sometimes if he feels like, utters a sentence or two. And no way is he telling Stiles that he of all people has crush on Stiles. Stiles would say something so bitingly sarcastic that it would cut right through Derek’s think rhino like armor of ‘ _I don’t give a fuck_ ’ and then he may want to curl up an die in an embarrassing replay of a ridiculous and stupid as shit romantic comedy.

Derek has got pride. And ego. Stiles bodily meeting surfaces horizontal and vertical shall continue as per usual. Nothing more, nothing less.

Derek could always write it in a diary or something but:

a)      Derek is not a thirteen year old girl

b)      Did you fucking not read? Derek is not a prepubescent girl who will cry into his diary of sparkles and bullshit about how _‘omg, how could he not like me, wai god wai, I hate myself etc._ ’

Could the universe just smite him now and get over with it?

\--

It is in a moment of desperation that Derek has a brainwave.

\--

He goes weekly to visit Peter, spend sometime time at his bedside, make some awkward one-sided conversation and then come back with the vague notion of having performed a familial duty of sorts.

The nurses think it’s oh so sweet of him and Derek thinks if they knew him any better; they might just run away or actually try to climb him like a tree and fix him.  He just does not get the second part. Doesn’t understand why women will waste half their time on a guy who is not even worth it. At least Derek is somewhat gay (?) (He doesn’t know he’s never been attracted to a guy before. Maybe this some sort of Stiles-sexual thing? A disease that has a cure. Derek can hope, fuck you very much.) So that excludes him from this whole nonsense.

Where was he?

Yeah. Brainwave.

Maybe he could confess it to him? Derek is desperate enough that he almost considers it. But decides not to at the last moment.

As always, exactly the opposite happens.

\--

During one of his (not)conversations with Peter, to fill a particularly long and awkward stretch of silence, Derek just blurts it out.

Honestly, it just comes tumbling out, a mess of words.

Apparently, that was just the dam breaking.

Feeling somewhat stupid and vulnerable at the same time, he leaves post haste right after.

The next visit, his uncle receives a lecture on why Stiles Stillinski is a menace to humanity in general and more importantly, to Derek’s sanity.

The visit after that, Peter gets a list of Stiles’s most attractive attributes. This is the order in which the two hour long speech is delivered. Also, bulleted for ease of understanding.

  * Stiles is brave.
  * Stiles is loyal.
  * Stiles’ bow shaped lips make Derek’s pants feel uncomfortably tight.
  * Stiles way of talking is actually quite soothing. Like letting cool water wash over you.
  * Stiles never gives up.
  * Stiles saves the lives of people like Derek. People who work has hard as they can as pushing something good far far away from them so it won’t die a premature death.
  * Stiles understands family, Stiles understands the importance of pack. Stiles knows the importance of love. And losing someone you love.
  * Stiles loves unconditionally.
  * Stiles’ really bizarre sense of humor.
  * The mole right under Stiles’ right side of the jaw. Derek would like to lick it.
  * Stiles propensity to shriek like a girl. It makes the wolf inside of him want to give chase. Heh.
  * Stiles is Stiles. Never anything else.



Derek tries to keep the list in general g-rated but a few things sneak in, some far too filthy to even think about again (which will of course happen again). Derek knows that he shouldn’t be saying this to a comatose person of all people but honestly, he doesn’t think Peter is ever going to wake up and be functional and he’s somewhat secure in the knowledge that whatever he says will stay with Peter and never reach anyone else’s ears.  More importantly, Stiles will never know, not unless he suddenly decides to swing Derek’s way, in which case Stiles will be the first one to hear it from Derek. And along with that experience a few other things that Derek has been dying to do for god knows how along.

In yet another instance of the universe showing it’s ass to him (Derek is not keeping score, okay he is. Derek, 0. Universe, 124562389.)

Peter Hale decides to wake the fuck up. And goes after Stiles.

From then on, it all goes to shit.

\--

Long story short, Derek kills Peter. At first, the fight had sort of been one sided with only Scott for company and the two of them get thrown around like lifeless dolls until the others ( Lydia, Jackson and awww! Stiles) show up and burn him. And then Derek guts his throat, like an animal being slaughtered – all for Laura, poor sweet Laura who shouldn’t have to have died for the mad power trips of the Peter Hales of the world – and tastes sweet vengeance.

Of course, this blissful state of euphoria where he’s the king of the world does not last for long. Reality kicks in like the bitch it is.

To summarize succinctly, Derek goes from being restless werewolf with on a quest to find out who killed his sister with a completely inappropriate crush on a seventeen year old to a newly minted alpha with a pack full of disgruntled teens for company with an even more inappropriate crush on a seventeen year old.

Who also by the way is also pack.

Somehow, Derek doesn’t seen how he’s going to keep his strong ( like gale force wind strong) feelings under control now, seeing that Stiles is always going to be within reach now and Derek’s impulse control is going to be tested severely, what with petulant teenagers and a crush he can’t shut up just by kissing.

He’s really regretting sharing like a thirteen year old now. Because obviously, if he hadn’t shared any of his feelings with his apparently paralyzed uncle, he could have still been in some seriously deep denial and honestly, it ain’t a bad place to be.

Universe, a eleventy bajillion. Derek, forever playing catch-up.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta'd like whoa. Would anyone like to help a girl out?
> 
> Also, dont hate me for what I have wrought. Sometimes, a girl has feels which she then needs to just get out of her ystem by writing ridiculous fic. Please feel free to whatever I have gotten wrong, I'll fix it right away. :)


End file.
